Web Wall Journal #4

Much love goes out to all of you on this warm September Sunday. While you were all (actually, while you were some) in church this morning, I was sleeping and eating. But never fear, I will be attending church tonight, so my soul isn't entirely in jeopardy.

I also want you all to know, I have been thinking a lot about all of you, and everyone I've spoken to this week, for whatever reason, I've been praying for you. Naturally, this means more to some people than others, but regardless, I want you all to know that I am actively loving you, and just because I'm far away doesn't mean I have better things to do.

I also want to thank those of you who have supplied me with food recently. Randel, I hope you're reading this one, because all the banana bread is gone (my roommate and small group enjoyed it) and I thank you for giving me alternative breakfast for this week. Mom, the cookies disappeared because everyone loves them. Especially me. With that being said, if anyone is in the midst of making a care package or anything like it, PLEASE DON'T SEND ME ANY BREAKFAST FOOD! I had no room for all my goodies when I got back last weekend. Eating became a chore. I will let you know when I begin to starve.

Otherwise, this week has been good. Started it out on Monday afternoon, where I returned from Hampshire, organized my laundry for the next two weeks, then Sarah and I chose to do some slight rearranging. All we did was move my bookcase from my dresser to below the window, but the place looks so much more comfortable and I officially love being in here. In place of the bookcase we rehung Picasso and now the dresser is a space for me to place food I wish to share. (Currently, it is lemon poppy-seed scones, though last week it was cookies followed by banana bread.) The djembe is back on display, because Sarah loves it, and now all my books are at arm's reach from my sleeping place. I can't wait until people come to visit, it's quite lovely here.

The loveliness is also aided by the addition of two newcomers to the room. My RA has a little forest in her room or spider plants, and one very prolific one (named Harry) had grown many little babies, so on Thursday our floor had a potting party and Sarah and I brought home baby spider plants. My spider plant actually resembles Dad's hair when he's due for a cut, so I felt it appropriate to give him a name that was loosely connected to Dad, and started mentally rifling through music Dad has provided me with in the past (thank you, Daddy) and David Bowie popped into my head. So, my plant is now named Ziggy Stardust. And he sits right beside my John Lennon glasses.

Speaking of John Lennon and music Dad provides me with (ahem) I'm hoping that everyone celebrated 09/09/09! Beatles Rock Band came out as well as DIGITALLY RE-MASTERED BEATLES MUSIC ON CD! I was giddy all day.

Other than the Beatles, though, this has been an excellent week. Very, very active. The good news is that I finally can say I love being here, and returning from Hampshire was not as sad as I thought it was going to be. In fact, I was quite excited to be back and get the week started. And, while I've been awake, life has been quite enjoyable. Oddly enough, sleeping hasn't been so great. Don't get me wrong, I've been sleeping a lot lately, but there have been more than a few nights this week that have been plagued with nightmares. What's funny is that while I'm consciously having the time of my life, unconsciously I'm taking all the worst times of my life and combining them into these horrible scenarios I have to live out until I wake myself up. It's a bit confusing, considering things here have progressed exceptionally well for the most part. Usually nightmares have stimuli, but I haven't figured it out yet.

As far as classes go, I can tell I'm getting complacent because if I have an hour between classes, I may or may not do my homework. I'm most likely reading Newsweek. College life, I suppose. I did do some significant preliminary research for my chem term paper, and I know I want to do this topic, (media and propoganda influence on the environment) but I'm going to have to consult once more with my professor to see if I can do it. Depends on what we cover in class, to be honest.

Poetry has just gotten more fun because it involves essays and peer editing. Woot!

But the real story of the week stems from Philosophy. (Anybody surprised?) Believe it or not, I did forget something in the last update regarding this class. The text brought up the Euthyphro question: Is good good because God says it's good? Or does God say it's good because it's good? The truth is, I'd never wondered that before. I paused while reading and began thinking about the text in the Bible, specifically at the beginning of Genesis: "And God saw that it was good." (Genesis 1:25 b.) This phrasing implies to me that "good" was around prior to the creation of the earth. And then there is the idea that I've heard enforced often in religious teachings, that God is incapable of doing evil. These thoughts led me to thinking the latter. Additionally, something just seemed too arbitrary about God on whim selecting what was good and what was evil. (Don't slap me for blasphemy, anyone, finish reading first.)

Then I thought of the phrase "God is good" and had an epiphany. Generally we think of that phrase in these grammatical terms: Noun, verb, adjective. But what if we heard it a bit differently, not as "God is good (adjective)" but as "God is good (noun)"? What if God is goodness itself? That would explain the impossibility of doing evil, because if he did evil, he wouldn't be good. And he is goodness itself. Personally, I believe God encompasses so much, and that the idea of him as an abstract concept such as goodness doesn't bother me. It seems fitting.

So, that was a thought I had last week, and to my parents and Emily, I expressed this thought. This week, though, it actually had some applicable significance. When we finally got around to talking about the Euthyphro question in class, a lot of my more theistic friends got upset, because option a (God setting the rules) sounded prosaic but option b (God enforcing goodness) sounded blasphemous. As it came up at the end of class on Tuesday, my professor decided to postpone discussion on it until Thursday. When Thursday came around, I could see some still unhappy people and decided to vocalize this thought written in detail above. It is a discussion based class encouraging stretching the mind, right?

So I thought. I said my part and half of the class straightened in their seats and hands shot into the air. What excited me most wasn't that people were agreeing with this idea, but that they were building off of it, and making connections I wouldn't have thought of on my own. For once, we weren't just going over what we'd read, we were experimenting with possibilities and ideas. However, my professor hushed everyone, gave me a strange look with a "I don't understand what you're trying to say" and immediately dismissed us with a "We'll come back to that." She never did, and went right back into review of the text. She shouldn't have been surprised when she asked a question and nobody wanted to volunteer an answer. Students around me assured me they understood exactly what I said and agreed with the idea, so I know I wasn't being inarticulate. I didn't speak for the remainder of class, annoyed that her "thinking outside the box" concept didn't include anything outside of her box. Near the end when she started tossing out correlation study statistics, and implied that correlation studies show causation, (which anyone whose taken any kind of psych or statistics class will know that is twisting evidence and that correlation does NOT equal causation) I finally just got royally pissed. Thank goodness the class was getting let out, so my exit was at an acceptable time. Even if we hadn't been, I might have left anyway.

So, I chose not to leave her box for the take home exam due on Thursday. Tonight I'll double check to make sure I don't break off onto any enlightening tangents.

Though I know it has deviated a bit, while we are on the topic of God, I promise I have been working on the modern-day Christ story. The whole point of sending writing with emails is so that everyone back home can read any new things written. Unfortunately, this story is a beast, so I'm still not finished. But I'm definitely working toward the end now. In the meantime, this week's featured story is going to be "Self-Reliant," since I've been using Ninja's whiny "mow" lately. Some habits die hard.

Other than that irritant on Thursday, (and the towels that still give off fuzzies when I try to dry off after a shower!) things have gone quite well around here. I've hung out with Mark three times this week (Janna busy? Ha.) and had dinner last night with Matthew's cousin Gretchen, who is a sophomore here. Last night there was an 80's party at Sigma Pi that I did not go to. Momentarily, I felt like a loser when I saw all the girls getting ready while I adorned myself in PJ's, but I don't dance. So, instead Sarah and myself, along with a friend from Munsell, hung out in our room and watched YouTube videos all night with popcorn. This morning after brunch, we had even more company. Though I thought my first weekend actually here on campus without distractions was going to be boring, I have been consistently occupied. Right now, actually, I should be watching the English softball game, (Literature vs. Writing) but couldn't find the softball field and decided I didn't want to bask in the humidity anyway.

As far as events on campus go, Wednesday, Greg Mortenson came to speak. For those of you who don't know, incoming freshman read Three Cups of Tea over the summer. Basically, it's about Greg Mortenson and how he ended up building schools in Pakistan and Afghanistan for children and women. The story is fascinating, and even if you don't read the book, at least look up a summary online, because what he's doing is so valuable and it was a privilege to hear him speak on Wednesday.

Friday, instead of doing my essay test for philosophy, I went over to the student center with Sarah and the twins from my poetry class (they identify me as the "hand-talker" and inform people that's how one can see I'm Greek) and we saw Roy Wood Jr., a stand-up comedian. Very, very smart planning on the part of IWU, as I was exhausted and stressed from a week's worth of classes and was overdue for a good laugh. Came back to the dorm afterward feeling quite refreshed, as he was very funny. Makes me excited for next weekend, hopefully they'll have more stuff going on. The only thing I know of coming up isn't even directly affiliated with the school, but Donald Miller, who wrote Blue Like Jazz is coming to a local church on Thursday, October 29th. I absolutely have to get myself there.

That is the news from Bloomington for this week. I have also made the executive decision that if my towels are still making me fuzzy after another laundry cycle, I'll be recruiting Mom to bring me not-so-crappy ones.

Also, for those of you who enjoy lyrics, look up the song of the month.
Song of the Month: "Economy of Mercy" by Switchfoot
Song of the Day: "Just Like You" by 3 Days Grace

Until next week!

Janna